Sabrejack.com

It started with Warioware on the DS. Talk talk talk talk talk. Seriously.. The gamecube version had almost no story at all.. it was just GO GO GO… and it worked perfectly fine. The version for the DS sat you through a 2-3 minute storyline for each section of the game.. which I couldn’t have cared less about. It’s warioware! There is no story! THERE SHOULD BE NO STORY! ugghh..

So then I buy the new Paper Mario for the Wii and wtf.. It took 15 minutes of rapid-fire text skipping to get past the intro story and actually start playing world 1-1. And every major world change (2-1) comes with another 5+ minute interlude. WTF. It’s a Mario game.. there’s no story! Just save the princess! good grief..

Zelda was no exception. I must have spent hours in the first area of Twilight Princess and it was BORING AS SHIT. The only thing keeping me playing the game was the Zelda name. Had it been a lesser title, I would have quit right there. I guess that doesn’t matter to them since they already have my money.. but geez.. can you put forth at least a little effort to hook your player at the beginning?

moving on.

I gotta say the recent attempts at a “forced meme” in the advertising world are driving me batty. The skittles berries and cream idiot is just one example.. but the one that nearly has me changing the channel is “He went to Jared”.. it’s painfully obvious they’re tooting their own horn, nobody that -I- know of would give two shits which bargain jeweler you went to for your ring. The campaign has “backfire” written all over it. I hope it dies.

anyhow…

A couple weeks ago the primary HDD on my gaming system failed. It was replaced on warranty.. During that process I upgraded to Windows Vista.. short story: It’s very nice looking, does definitely like to hog ram, requires a halfway decent video card, and is total, absolute shit for PC gaming. If your game uses Punkbuster, in particular, you can expect extended periods of 10fps while it does god knows what (this happens every 5 minutes or so), and on occasion, total system lockups that last 5+ seconds (this happens every 10 minutes or so.) If you’re flying a jet or a chopper in BF2, for example, say hello to the ground. It wants to be your friend. Anyhow, I’m back on Windows XP now until Vista gets their shit together.

- Pete

Edit: It’s actually a starburst commercial, not a skittles commercial.  Just goes to show — I remembered the singing idiot, but not the product.